!upstarter Punk Reviews

(c) 2009 Century Media Records
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Imagine, if you will, that Korn went to Alice in Wonderland-land and attempted to pick a fight with the Cheshire Cat. After the fracas begins, Evanescence pops up along with Paul Gilbert and Barney from Napalm Death and everyone starts smacking each other around with guitars and vocal processors and junk. In the end everyone tires themselves out from ridiculous amount of fronting and lame-ass boredom. Nobody wins. If this CD was a joke it wouldn’t be nearly as funny as the fact that it’s not. Suffer! Arrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr
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rrrgggggggggggggggggggggggggggg
ggggggggggggggggggggg
ggggggggggggggggggggggggggghhhhhh
hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (this is what it would sound like if you tried to sing along)

Jerry Actually

(c) 1999 Nuclear Blast Records
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An album 13 long fuckin’ years in the making has finally arrived, and it is, as the title claims, Bigger Than The Devil. S.O.D. is back for their first studio album in 13 years and with the full original line up to boot. I went and got this disk the day it came out, sorry it’s taken so long for the review, but the damn thing was on loan to all my friends. I popped this CD into the player as soon as I got home and it started flying out of my speakers in a full frontal assault. This my friends is what aggro hardcore is all about. I’m not going to waste my time blathering on about the might of S.O.D. or the way Billy Milano stopped a show about ten years ago so I could find my glasses in the pit. All I’m gonna say is that this album kicks your ass, go get the fucking thing or I’m sure that Sgt.. D will hunt you down and kill your lame ass!

–Jerry Actually

(c)1999 – Epitaph Records
Rating:

Well, I can’t honestly say that I’m giving this CD a fair and honest review, but I’ll do my best. I actually only got to listen to the thing one time through before I had to go out of town, while which Mrs. Upstarter promptly removed the CD from the changer and as of now it is MIA. What I did gather from the listen that I got is that “Dirty Sanchez” is a bit better than the previously released “Kicked In The Teeth” Zeke has lost a little bit of that Kiss feel (not all of it, just some) and overall the songs rock pretty well. The mystery/bonus track is pretty damn funny for those of us that are old enough to remember. anyway I gave this disc a three out of a possible five on the !upstarter “UP” rating scale perhaps fair, perhaps not. At any rate not bad for a bunch of Seattle post grunge boys.

–Jerry Actually

(c) 2008 Trustkill Records
Rating:

What do we have here? Lots o’ metal for damn sure. Not the worst I’ve heard, but not necessarily something I’m down with. It has some decent riffage but it also has a lot of wankin emo mello crap interludes. I guess you get what you pay for huh? At any rate if you like modern metal then you’ll love the livin’ daylights out of Adversary.

–Jerry Actually

Bloodbath – The Wacken Carnage(c) 2008 Peaceville RecordsBloodbath is a Swedish metal supergroup of sorts consisting of members of Katatonia and Opeth. The Wacken Carnage is a live CD/DVD double set from the bands brutal performance at the 2005 Wacken Open Air Festival. What can I say other than this mother shreds. (to the extreme) Of all the metal I’ve been listening to lately, I must admit that I’m rather fond of Bloodbath. They really bring it on home. Granted, I still could sleep easier at night without the sound of vocal chords shredding. What they lack in my particular vocal preference, is more than made up for with speed and aggression. Get this set, pop in the CD or DVD and enjoy the ensuing Bloodbath.–Jerry Actually

SiX – Between the Warning and the War(c) 2008 1605 Records So I’ve been having an overall lack of creativity as it pertains to writing lately. This new record by SIX hasn’t helped. I’m torn. It has the goods; It is fierce and aggressive. The riffs rule. The vocals don’t suck razorblades. So then why am I uncertain about how much I do or don’t enjoy it? I don’t really know. I’m gonna go out on a limb before my coffee kicks in and say that I do in fact like the disc. After all it gets a ringing endorsement and even a guest spot from Mike Clark on track 4 “Forgiveness” and features Franki Doll on track 5 “Perfect Life”.I guess the trepidation comes in on more of a personal level. I just don’t get into the metal like I once did. But by way of an endorsement of my own, if anything were going to pull me back over to the metal side, it would be this. Between the Warning and the War nearly rekindles the spirit of old Prong for me except with a Left Coast feel. That is certainly something in the background that draws me to this disc. I guess all the vascillating aside, SIX busts with some dark aggressive music in a unique but decidedly metal vein. The more I listen to it, the more I warm to it. So this one is up in the air but I think it’ll land heads up.–Jerry Actually

Arson Anthem – S/T (c) 2007 Housecore RecordsFrom the aftermath of Hurricane Katrina arises the legacy of hardcore brutality. Mike Williams lost a lot, including his home, in the post Katrina riots. Phil Anselmo just happened to have a spare apartment. The two sat around spending hours listening to Phil’s early hardcore music collection. Throw Hank III and Collin Yeo into the equation and you’ve got Arson Anthem. The self-titled debut has eight track of old school, raw as all get out, hardcore reminiscent of bands like Negative Approach and early Agnostic Front. On top of the brutality, you can still hear the southern roots. It makes for an interesting sound, like the Allman Brothers in an alternate universe or something. My personal imaginings aside, you too can find something old in something new when you rock the paint off the sonofabitchin’ walls with Arson Anthem.–Jerry Actually

(c) 2003 Victory Records

Rating:

Between the Buried and Me has struck me to be one of the most intriguing bands that I have come across. This five piece band out of NC has shown a refreshing side of the “metalcore” scene. They express their diversity in many ways throughout the entire album that can send you on an emotional rollercoaster. “Lost Perfection” starts you off with countless mathematically sequenced rhythms leave you begging for more. From Clutch to Six Feet Under riffs you never lose interest on what the band is revealing to you. From there you get about half way into the album and it takes a heart felt anthem feeling with some ambient guitar tones, completely different from what the album began with. Lead singer Tommy Rogers continues to show his varied singing attributes throughout the clean softer part of the album. You get an abrupt awakening when “Ad a dglgmut” opens up, and the album continues its precise placement of speedy “riffery” to the end. This CD has not left my stereo yet….

Fulcrum